IELTS

So where were we.. uhmmm.

IELTS, akhirnya gue tes IELTS.

Bangun setengah enam pagi, I took a sleeping pill the night before, so I got 5 to 6 hrs of sleep, not too shabby lah ya. Gue udah panik dari malam dan beberapa hari sebelumnya, Bagus seperti biasa, memutuskan untuk panik di hari H. So yeah, hari H, gue reserved energy, muka datar, gerak seminimal mungkin, nafas setenang mungkin, sebisa mungkin gak bicara, sedangkan Bagus gak berhenti ngomong OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD dari sejak di dalam lift turun apartment mau berangkat... Asli, kayak Melancholia. Gue Kirsten Dunst dan dia Charlotte Gainsbourg.

Sampai di tempat tes jam setengah 8 kurang, yang ternyata sekolah anak orang kaya di dekat PIM, kita harus ngumpul di aula basket untuk foto dan finger scan, which took roughly almost 2 hrs karena antre.
Gue sama Bagus langsung panik karena ngelihat orang-orang di sana bawa binders full of stickies, notebooks, like wh-.. wh-.. hah???? Mungkin mereka les dulu, mungkin mereka ambil test yang academic or something, maybe their whole lives depend on this test.. tapi kami si arogan gak belajar dan menyiapkan apa-apa sama sekali. Well, we kinda took TOEFL IBT test i l e g a l not too long ago sih but still???

Ngantuknya... Also I was parched. Terus pingin poop juga.
Dan tentunya situasi kayak gini gak lengkap ya kalo belom dibikin panik.
Sudah dibilangin untuk bawa pensil HB kan.. Dan suatu hari gue ke mall, gue pikir sekalian beli pensil deh, tapi pensil HB yang tersedia cuma ada sekotak isi 12 gitu. Buat apa gue beli sebanyak itu kan, 50k-60k an juga? Jadi gue memutuskan untuk beli 2 pensil mekanik dengan leads 2B dan leads HB terpisah.
Ya terus... Gak muat dong... Si bego gak merhatiin ukuran leadsnya :))))) pensilnya 0.5 dan leads nya 0.7. This friggin test tuh kayak udah wanti-wanti di email macam... telat datang atau gak bawa ID - NO REFUND.. kan serem ya. 3 juta melayang for nothing. Kayak makes sense aja gitu kalau pensilnya bukan HB - TERUS PLS GET THE FUCK OUUUUT atau semacamnya.
Tapi untungnya pengawas bilang gak apa dan nanti bisa minta ke pengawas sebelum tes. Phew. Tapi paniknya gak worth it asli. So I pooped afterwards. Terus ya... flush nya kurang kenceng dong... poop gue gak masuk masuk. Sebel banget ga sih. Pagi-pagi loh ini. Kurang tidur. Dan gue belom mandi karena pagi-pagi rasanya dingin. Jadi gue diem bentar dan coba flush lagi. 3 kali sampai gue udah gak liat apa apa lagi.

Akhirnya jam 10 diarahkan ke ruang kelas. Duduk di kursi. Dan pengawas bacain rules and everything DENGAN BRITISH ACCENT ALA ALA. Demi Tuhan gue ga denger dia ngomong apa, jelekkk bangettttt. Jadi gue cuma ambil kata-kata kuncinya aja gitu sambil berusaha gak cringe. Pronounciationnya excruciating sekali. Gue kasih nilai 9, tuh perfect IELTS score, buat kepercayaan dirinya.

1st part, listening test. Yang paling gue takuti.
Mesin gue belum panas pula.
So my worries, they all came true. I fuckin tanked it.
40 soal dan gue gatau berapa yang bener.
Masalahnya, kita gak dengerin dengan headphones macam IBT, ini diputar di boombox di ruangan kelas yang ada gemanya. Gak ada pengulangan of course. Dan kita mesti sambil baca soal beserta pilihannya.
Ada 4 bagian kalau gak salah. Bagian pertama pura-pura jadi tukang servis kulkas oke lah ya. Kayaknya bener semua, gue yakin.
Bagian kedua... waini. 2 scientists, ngomongin tree pollen and allergies. Oak tree pollen birch tree pollen blablabla.. gue ngerasa mereka nyebutin semua poin yang ada di options oh god what the fuck did they just sayyyyy tiba-tiba aja mereka udah sampai soal ketiga dari topik ini sedangkan nomor satu dan dua aja belum keisi. Dan akhirnya makin kacau di bagian ketiga, yang ternyata lanjutan dari topik serbuk dan pohon ini. Ngepet. Bagian terakhir ngomongin soal gizi keluarga tapi kayaknya lumayan oke sih.
My heart sunk. But what else could I do. So I tried to gather my... soul yang udah terbang-terbang ke sepenjuru ruangan.

Reading test. I aced it yoooo I'm confident. Quite easy.

Next, writing test. Hmmmm. I think I did alright.
There were 2 sections. 1st one, 150 words. I gotta write a complain letter or some sort. Ceritanya I took an evening course, course nya oke tapi ada tapinya. Nah yaudah ngarang aja tuh mau complain apa. Jadilah gue mengarang indah, gue ambil course Eastern Art History I with Professor Kentaro Sakaguchi yang sangat resourceful and he keeps the class fun and upbeat blablabla tapi kok AC nya dingin banget sampe-sampe murid kedinginan susah fokus terus microphone nya suka ngadat jadi ganggu lecture etc. Ya ya ya.
Second section dong... 250 words. Gue yang sangat gak kritis ini disuruh kasih opini about increasing tax on petrol to deal with traffic and pollution... Idk man, gue naik kereta dan gojek??? What do I know. Ya udah gue kayak gak setuju, selama ini bukannya harga bensin naek mulu?? Terus emang jadinya gak macet? Kan kagak yak. Terus gue bilang (gue mau ngomong public transportation ya but for whatever reason gue blank... gue sampe mejem mejem mata berusaha gali kata tersebut dari kepala gue tapi ga muncul... akhirnya gue bilang...) commuting experience nya dibenerin coba, kalo nyaman dan reliable kan orang milih naik public transport krn actually bawa kendaraan sendiri quite a hassle blabla. Also parks would be nice, spread out in the city, with big trees, jogging tracks, flower beds, ponds, nyenyenyenye. Terus gue kehabisan poin... terus waktu tinggal 10 menit... gue udah gatau mau provide poin apalagi dan tulisan gue paling baru 170an kata? Waktu akhirnya tinggal 5 menit lagi... dan gue buru-buru kasih conclusion lumayan nambah 20 30 kata??? ENTAHLAH. I just hope, my writing's comprehensible and my choice of words could show that I am. more. than. capable.

Si Bagus dong, dia kelar cepet banget. Macam temen sekelas yang pintar dan kiasu dan kelar cepet banget. Well, he's pretty smart but stiiiilll. Cek lagi kek apa kek. Gue lihat kertas writing dia penuh dengan tulisan!

Selesai semua writing test jam 1. Dan apa apaan, speaking test nya beda tempat, 2.9 juta dan mereka ga bisa sediain tempat yang efisien. Jadwal speaking test gue setengah 4 sore dan Bagus setengah 5 dong. Seenggaknya kita sempat ke PIM dulu untuk makan siang dan bengong sih. Tapi demi apapun otak gue rasanya kayak... kabelnya udah meletek meletek keluar percikan api gitu. Im draiiiined. My brain was fried. Gosong. Muka gue berminyak. Rambut gue lepek. Muka gue jelek banget. Dan kalau kurang tidur jam 1an itu kan pas jam super ngantuk-ngantuknya. I was this close to... jorokkin orang ke truk tronton.

Setelah makan di PIM, kita jalan (untungnya walking distance) ke kantor IELTS nya di samping PIM1 (ruko sederetan Ranch Market situ loh). Anyway, karena ga bisa cyrogenic sleep buat buang waktu, jadilah gue rasakan itu menunggu berjam-jam sampai nama gue dipanggil. Finger scan etc, gue disuruh ke basement dan masuk ke ruangan pengujinya. Pengujinya of course native speaker, bapak-bapak dengan nama Patrick, wajahnya emotionless dan gak bisa ditebak ekspresinya. Maybe he's tired. Atau mungkin memang seharusnya begitu. I thought this speaking test would be more... conversational? But apparently lebih kayak tanya jawab. Bahkan dia gak lihat muka gue sama sekali pas gue ngomong. His accent was quite thick. I don't know which accent was that, perhaps Australian? Rasanya dia kayak mumbled dan muttered gitu ngomongnya. Karena dia nunduk ke kertasnya melulu jadi dia gak bisa lihat ekspresi gue yang mengerutkan dahi berusaha keras mendengarkan omongan dia.

Speaking testnya ada 3 bagian, first part, dia nanya gue soal gue. Like what do I do, do I work or still in school.. so I said Im working as a graphic designer?? A lie obvi. Terus dia nanya apakah gue punya teman di kantor.. like duh.. of course i do. I have two best friends, anxiety and restlessness. Terus dia nanya do you like music. Music is my constant companion, I said. What kind of music do I like. Pop music, biar gampang. Dia nanya pop music berubah ga dulu sama sekarang. Gue bilang aja pop music is always evolving blablabla. Terus dia nanya gue suka merhatiin advertising ga? Gue tipe orang yang gampang kemakan advertising ga? Yah gitu lah. Macam ask.fm hahaha.

Part 2, gue harus mikirin jawaban dari sebuah pertanyaan dan gue mesti jelasin selama 2 menit non stop sampai dia bilang berhenti.

"What kind of television programme do you enjoy?"
- what is it about
- nonton di mana
- nonton sama siapa
- kenapa suka

Fuck yes to the question, but oh no cos Ive watched too much TV, dan gue harus milih sekarang juga acara apa yang kira kira bakaln bikin jawaban gue jadi gampang. Jadi gue jawab Terrace House, netflix, with my room mate, it's a reality tv show about 6 strangers living together in a house blablabla it's so relaxing and zen-like blablabla a window to Japanese culture blablabla... terus gue dah kehabisan omongan dan dia diem... dan gue bisa dengar detik jam dinding... dan gue panik karena gue masih ada sisa waktu untuk ngomong dan GUE SPEECHLESS AND THE NERVES GOT TO ME... "So yeah... (repeating my words as a conclusion)"... *sigh

Part 3, dia ngasih pertanyaan based on previous topic. Dia nanya gue suka nonton TV lokal apa enggak, kenapa gak suka, terus orang-orang sekarang emang nontonnya apa dan di mana, ya gitu-gitu lah. Terus gatau gimana pokoknya pertanyaannya sampai ke, menurut lo informasi yang sekarang lo dapetin lewat internet itu bisa pure and unbiased apa enggak... Gue udah gak inget gue jawab apa.

He said okay that was it dan gue dipersilahkan pergi. Gue lega selega-leganya. Jalan kembali ke atas dengan lunglai. Gimana susahnya yang academic ya... tapi gue langsung mengubur dalam-dalam pikiran tersebut like bye bitch who the fuck cares I'm glad this shit is oveeeeer.

Gue naik, ceritain semua yang terjadi barusan ke Bagus dan orang sebelahnya yang ikutan curi dengar tapi pura-pura lihat henpon (I hope he did well). Dan gue minta pulang duluan untuk beberes karena nyokapnya Bagus mau visit dan nginap malamnya. Jalan balik macet pula... Sesampainya gue segera nyapu-pel-nyapu lagi, sikat toilet, lap cermin kamar mandi sekaligus mandi. Kemudian gue gabruk ke kasur dan tewas.

... Gue gak pernah ngeluarin uang sebanyak itu seumur hidup untuk sesuatu yang gak menyenangkan sama sekali. :') But heeeeey finger crossed. Pls pls pls IELTS god, hear my prayer, semoga gue dan Bagus lolos dengan nilai baik. I mean, untuk WHV yang dibutuhkan cuma 4.5, tapi kan gue mau scorenya cakep siapa tahu memperbesar kemungkinan WHV kami keterima. I mean I'm not worried about his score sih hmph, but mine, I want at least... 7 gitu? But I guess 6.5 would also be nice 😞

- - -

Sekarang gue pulang Serpong setelah hampir 3 minggu gak pulang. Sampai-sampai langsung ambruk dan sakit. :')

But I got some things to tell, so expect for multiple posts this month. Hehe...
Lol it's as if I'm talking to a reader. Selama ini gue ngoceh di blog ngebayangin gue lagi cerita sama gue satu lagi yang lagi duduk menyilangkan kaki dan mendengarkan dengan atentif di depan gue.

That's it for now, I got some articles to write.. sigh.

EH GA BOLEH NGELUH MAU DUIT ENGGAAAA.

Iya, mau.

😞

Comments

  1. Anonymous23.1.24

    speaking nya segampang itu kah pas lu dapet bagian speaking nya? Cuz you''ll never know what topics they will throw to you. Could be sounded unfamiliar or way off to you to express. Also, 6.5 was ok good. Different people different capability whatever how far they are fucking trying. That's why I reluctant to take IELTS though. *Disclaimer: Actually I've been to Canada two in a half for college. I went there without english proficiency test. Perhaps, this was sounded unusual to you but it was true. So yeah I went there without IELTS because the college that I went to will test me while I'm already there. *poof yes I was being tested in that college the other day. It went quick, and the difficulty was that so so for the college english test actually. Furthermore, I got placed in uncredited english meaning I only focused on english first. It was english 097. Meaning you can take other courses but you get constrained to take it. I think it was math, and Econ (economi) courses. Only two for english 097 and 098. I believe. If you move up you to english 099, english 100 > above, you will gradually can take credited courses as many you want until fulfill your degree requirement. Keep in mind that english 099 wasn't a credited course it does not count to your credit. The only thing you have to do is whether you take some english proficiency test, or pass the class. There was a point where I decided to choose to take duolingo so that I can move to english 099 from english 098 because If you don't then you will be as dumb as others repeating the english class. Dumb meaning not knowing there was an alternative way to tackle the english without you have take the actual english class. (It was a COVID era, online class era).

    In short, I started to feel uneasy in this college. I just didn't feel like it. The college was sucked ass. Since, I haven't decided to pursue on what my career would be just like everybody else does (some) I tried to apply to music for production school in Vancouver, Canada because at that time I was interested in. However, It turned out I got rejected for some reason. My dream teared apart, so the only last step was you return to Indonesia for "safety reason", and start it all over again. Now I'm a fourth semester IR student at binus university. 2020 - 2022 was that year I will not forget, although Im not trying to remember it. Yet, I have to move on to good things.

    I just wanted to say that don't rush and take your time to decide whether you want to college overseas or not.

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